Simmons wants top order ‘to put things together’ in the powerplay

Post author By New Zealand Blog News Service
Post date February 25, 2025

ICYMI: Bangladesh are waiting on the fitness of Mahmudullah, who batted in the nets in Rawalpindi
http://dlvr.it/TJ9Vc1

Tory Whanau may have to sell Wellington mayoralty to make ends meet September 20, 2024
Tory Whanau has revealed that she’s struggling so much financially that she may have to part with her beloved mayoralty, that of New Zealand’s capital city, if she’s to fund her ever-diminishing lifestyle. Whanau was elected to lead Wellington in 2022, winning an overwhelming victory against the incumbent mayor: the evil version of Jason Gunn. […]
Ben Uffindell
Ukrainian militia receives defective shipment of pagers that just send and receive messages September 18, 2024
There’s been a major setback for one Ukrainian-backed militia on the Russian border, after the group ordered a large shipment of pagers to use as improvised explosive devices. The plan was to litter the pagers throughout abandoned homes and buildings in hopes of wounding Russian soldiers. But upon arrival of the shipment, routed through the […]
Ben Uffindell
Government directs Te Puni Kōkiri to conduct Māori Language Week in English September 17, 2024
The coalition government has issued a directive to Te Puni Kōkiri, the Ministry of Māori Development, instructing them that – in the interests of clear communication – they are to conduct this year’s Māori Language Week primarily or exclusively in English. The directive is in line with the Government’s policy – signaled when they came […]
Ben Uffindell
Government celebrates fact that New Zealand’s healthcare is so good people are queuing up for it at 5am September 17, 2024
At yesterday’s post-cabinet press conference, Prime Minister Christopher Luxon, flanked by his Health Minister Shane Reti and someone we can’t independently verify was a real sign language interpreter, announced that he had some positive news for the country. “Alright team, I’m just going to hand over to uh, Dr. Shane, because I think he’s got […]
Ben Uffindell
Heartwarming: Thoughtful driver uses indicator to tell you what they’ve just done September 17, 2024
It’s 4:10pm in the morning, and you’re in the middle lane heading north on the great southern motorway of our nation’s capital, Auckland. There are no cars directly in front of you, but quite a few in the lane to your left. Suddenly, without warning, a black ute enters your lane, cutting in front of […]
Ben Uffindell
NPC teams will now be allowed to actually use the Ranfurly Shield in play September 17, 2024
Following decades of controversy, the governing body of New Zealand rugby, New Zealand Rugby, has ruled that the team currently holding the Ranfurly Shield may once again use it in play during the National Provincial Championship (NPC). The ruling restores the utility of a prize that for many years was rendered merely symbolic, after the […]
Ben Uffindell
Police say they won’t respond to bomb threats anymore as ‘it’s never anything’ September 16, 2024
Police Commissioner Andrew Coster says that New Zealand’s police force will no longer respond to bomb threats, in an attempt to cut costs and redirect police resources to less boring activities. Coster said that threat response and bomb disposal was a “fairly obvious” area for downsizing, as bomb threats are “never anything”, a “huge waste […]
Ben Uffindell
Air New Zealand flight attendant named CEO after one year on job November 30, 2021
New Zealand’s national carrier, Air New Zealand, has expressed great enthusiasm in announcing its new CEO today: 51-year-old Nathan Guy, a flight attendant who has spent about 1200 hours on the job. Guy joined the company as a fresh-faced, wide-eyed flight attendant serving now-reduced domestic routes in November of 2020, and has since spent a […]
Ben Uffindell
National Party board denies it unanimously agreed to Collins’ Faustian bargain with Satan November 26, 2021
National Party president Peter Goodfellow is today issuing a strong denial on behalf of the party’s board, saying they did not, at any point, agree to the Faustian bargain that National leader Judith Collins struck with the Evil One, Son of Perdition, the Devil Satan himself. When Collins became the leader of the National Party […]
Ben Uffindell
Super Saturday recap: Patrick Gower doesn’t know what he’s supposed to do October 16, 2021
It was Aotearoa’s first national day of action in over ten years, the first since 2010, when Prime Minister John Key tried to inspire us to clean up our nation’s berms. It didn’t work. Today, New Zealand’s berms are worse than ever. But history is not destiny, and other cliches. Today, we tried again, this […]
Ben Uffindell

$213m lease approved to expand Woolworths' Chch distribution facility March 31, 2025
Woolworths' distribution centre on Shands Rd in Hornby. Photo: Supplied The Overseas Investment Office has approved a major supermarket chain's bid to lease a 10.5ha site in Christchurch to expand its South Island distribution centre.
Dining out 'should be considered a luxury': restaurateur March 31, 2025
'Hard to say' why kea numbers on rise March 31, 2025
A kea spotted in front of Aoraki/Mt Cook. Photo: Getty Images The number of kea - New Zealand's nationally endangered mountain parrot - is growing in numbers in Canterbury's Aoraki/Mount Cook National Park.
Kea caught nibbling on rescue chopper March 31, 2025
PHOTO: ANDY CRAIG A young kea puts on an impressive display after landing on the back of a South Island rescue helicopter.
Laine Priestley
Pay to pee trial proposed in Canterbury town March 31, 2025
The public toilets in the centre of Ashburton could be considered for a pay-to-use trial, as suggested by councilor Rob Mackle. PHOTO JONATHAN LEASK/LDR By Jonathan Leask of LDR
Planned Deans Ave pedestrian crossing 'a bit of a joke' March 31, 2025
A staggered pedestrian crossing with a fenced pedestrian refuge island on Deans Ave, between Oakford Close and Palazzo Lane, aims to provide a safe crossing point in a high use area for pedestrians. Image: Christchurch City Council A proposed pedestrian crossing to get people across a busy Christchurch road and into Hagley Park has become […]
Coalition holds slim lead in latest poll March 31, 2025
Pedestrian and truck in serious SH73 crash March 31, 2025
Emergency services have been called to a serious crash involving a pedestrian and a truck in Canterbury this morning.
Pedestrian, truck in serious Canterbury crash March 31, 2025
Emergency services have been called to a serious crash involving a pedestrian and a truck in Canterbury this morning.
ODT quiz: April 1 March 31, 2025

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