Simmons wants top order ‘to put things together’ in the powerplay

Post author By New Zealand Blog News Service
Post date February 24, 2025

Bangladesh are waiting on the fitness of Mahmudullah, who batted in the nets in Rawalpindi
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Tory Whanau may have to sell Wellington mayoralty to make ends meet September 20, 2024
Tory Whanau has revealed that she’s struggling so much financially that she may have to part with her beloved mayoralty, that of New Zealand’s capital city, if she’s to fund her ever-diminishing lifestyle. Whanau was elected to lead Wellington in 2022, winning an overwhelming victory against the incumbent mayor: the evil version of Jason Gunn. […]
Ben Uffindell
Ukrainian militia receives defective shipment of pagers that just send and receive messages September 18, 2024
There’s been a major setback for one Ukrainian-backed militia on the Russian border, after the group ordered a large shipment of pagers to use as improvised explosive devices. The plan was to litter the pagers throughout abandoned homes and buildings in hopes of wounding Russian soldiers. But upon arrival of the shipment, routed through the […]
Ben Uffindell
Government directs Te Puni Kōkiri to conduct Māori Language Week in English September 17, 2024
The coalition government has issued a directive to Te Puni Kōkiri, the Ministry of Māori Development, instructing them that – in the interests of clear communication – they are to conduct this year’s Māori Language Week primarily or exclusively in English. The directive is in line with the Government’s policy – signaled when they came […]
Ben Uffindell
Government celebrates fact that New Zealand’s healthcare is so good people are queuing up for it at 5am September 17, 2024
At yesterday’s post-cabinet press conference, Prime Minister Christopher Luxon, flanked by his Health Minister Shane Reti and someone we can’t independently verify was a real sign language interpreter, announced that he had some positive news for the country. “Alright team, I’m just going to hand over to uh, Dr. Shane, because I think he’s got […]
Ben Uffindell
Heartwarming: Thoughtful driver uses indicator to tell you what they’ve just done September 17, 2024
It’s 4:10pm in the morning, and you’re in the middle lane heading north on the great southern motorway of our nation’s capital, Auckland. There are no cars directly in front of you, but quite a few in the lane to your left. Suddenly, without warning, a black ute enters your lane, cutting in front of […]
Ben Uffindell
NPC teams will now be allowed to actually use the Ranfurly Shield in play September 17, 2024
Following decades of controversy, the governing body of New Zealand rugby, New Zealand Rugby, has ruled that the team currently holding the Ranfurly Shield may once again use it in play during the National Provincial Championship (NPC). The ruling restores the utility of a prize that for many years was rendered merely symbolic, after the […]
Ben Uffindell
Police say they won’t respond to bomb threats anymore as ‘it’s never anything’ September 16, 2024
Police Commissioner Andrew Coster says that New Zealand’s police force will no longer respond to bomb threats, in an attempt to cut costs and redirect police resources to less boring activities. Coster said that threat response and bomb disposal was a “fairly obvious” area for downsizing, as bomb threats are “never anything”, a “huge waste […]
Ben Uffindell
Air New Zealand flight attendant named CEO after one year on job November 30, 2021
New Zealand’s national carrier, Air New Zealand, has expressed great enthusiasm in announcing its new CEO today: 51-year-old Nathan Guy, a flight attendant who has spent about 1200 hours on the job. Guy joined the company as a fresh-faced, wide-eyed flight attendant serving now-reduced domestic routes in November of 2020, and has since spent a […]
Ben Uffindell
National Party board denies it unanimously agreed to Collins’ Faustian bargain with Satan November 26, 2021
National Party president Peter Goodfellow is today issuing a strong denial on behalf of the party’s board, saying they did not, at any point, agree to the Faustian bargain that National leader Judith Collins struck with the Evil One, Son of Perdition, the Devil Satan himself. When Collins became the leader of the National Party […]
Ben Uffindell
Super Saturday recap: Patrick Gower doesn’t know what he’s supposed to do October 16, 2021
It was Aotearoa’s first national day of action in over ten years, the first since 2010, when Prime Minister John Key tried to inspire us to clean up our nation’s berms. It didn’t work. Today, New Zealand’s berms are worse than ever. But history is not destiny, and other cliches. Today, we tried again, this […]
Ben Uffindell

Musician found guilty of domestic violence continues fight for name suppression April 28, 2025
A well-known musician found guilty of domestic violence in February is continuing to fight to keep his name a secret.
Govt eyeing more affordable domestic airfares April 28, 2025
Associate Transport Minister James Meager says the government is not ruling out underwriting finance for regional airlines to expand their fleets. Photo: RNZ The government is not ruling out underwriting the expansion of small regional airlines to help maintain routes and keep the price of flying competitive.
Philippines denies China seizure of disputed reef April 28, 2025
Wellington's Golden Mile upgrade poised to begin April 28, 2025
One dead, several injured after Florida ferry crash April 28, 2025
Emergency services at the scene following the ferry crash in Clearwater, Florida. Photo: Javier Vazquez/via REUTERS One person was killed and several injured after a ferry carrying 45 passengers in Clearwater, Florida was struck by a boat which then fled the scene, local officials say.
Gang links reportedly probed after funeral home fire April 28, 2025
Police guards have been stationed outside a funeral home in South Auckland's Māngere Bridge as they investigate a suspicious fire that broke out overnight.
Father who killed young son in crash released from jail April 28, 2025
Niklas Gebhardt. A Canterbury father who killed his six-year-old son in a car crash has been released from prison.
Panic in Pakistan as India vows to cut off water supply April 28, 2025
Should volunteer fireys be covered by ACC? April 28, 2025
Queenstown's volunteer fire brigade secretary Katherine Lamont's preparing to hand over a Parliamentary petition in Wellington on Friday afternoon, calling for the 12,000-odd volunteer fireys acros
Locals uneasy after spate of gang crimes in Wairoa April 28, 2025

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